Letting go of control: The art of Spiritual Surrender.
30 November 2020 

Letting go of control: The art of Spiritual Surrender.

Giving up control will help you to surrender to the Guidance of your beautiful Soul.

The fact that you are willing to read a post about letting go of control tells me that you are well on your way with your spiritual growth. Why? Because the ego wants to be in control. And when the ego step by step looses its power, you start to understand that you are not in control.art of surrender

And that’s when you become aware of the Art of Spiritual Surrender.

The ego tends to think that being in control means being responsible. And so it concludes that if you leave things up to the Universe, if you let things roll as they roll, you are being irresponsible. Which is the furthest from the truth you can think of!

Because responsability does not mean control, it means the ability to respond… to the calling of your soul!

In this post I will show you why control is actually blocking you from hearing your soul’s calling and how to practice the Art of Spiritual Surrender.

So, why are we not in control?

To answer that question we must look at the design of schoolroom Earth. Because it has been designed. Just like fear has been designed. Schoolroom Earth has been designed for an experiment: what it would be like to experience the opposite of love: fear.

We are all here learning lessons about love and fear. Our ego’s have been designed to be able to believe in fear. The only truth is love, but our ego’s have the capability to believe in lies, to believe that there is lack of anything, to believe that you can control the future and that if you don’t control the future things will go bad. Which, btw, are all lies…

Your ego has the ability to believe in fear, it seems very real, but it is just one version of reality. Thoughts like: “I will not get what I want if I don’t control the future.” are ego based thoughts.

Control is based in fear. The fear of missing out, the fear of lack, the fear of rejection, etc.

We are here to learn the co-creative process with our Devine parts (Higher Self and the Devine Child that lives in your heart) and our team of non physical guides. Your Devine Self is the one that is in control, not your ego.

We try to control our future because we are afraid what will happen if we don’t…

So control is fear based, and it is based on the belief that things naturally don’t work out in your favor. Which is a lie…Spiritual Confidence

Einstein said, “The most important decision we make is whether we believe we live in a friendly or hostile universe.”

Your beliefs are very important factors in the attraction of your reality. So if you believe in a hostile universe, that is what you will attract. If you believe in a friendly universe, that is what you will attract. Make your choice!

Plus, if you believe in a friendly or loving universe, you don’t need control of your future! Because then you don’t have to be afraid of what will happen when you let go of control! Then, you can start to practice the Art of Spiritual Surrender.

Control is our attachment to a specific outcome, our ego’s attachment to things having to happen in a certain way.

Let me show you an example to explain this. Have you ever had the experience of things turning out way better than you thought they could? When you learn to surrender to the plan of your Devine Self, this will happen more and more often.

When I was ready to buy the equipment to record my podcast, I waited for my Higher Self, or my intuition to give me the nudge to go out and buy the equipment. So one day I felt that I was ready. I had woken up with the lyrics of a Rolling Stones song: “It’s just a shot away, it’s just a shot away… He children… it’s just a shot away…” (song is called Gimme Shelter). It was in my head all the time, put there by my Higher Self.

Because my Higher Self knows I respond well to lyrics of songs.

I think the Rolling Stones have another meaning with these lyrics then my Higher Self. The meaning I received from my Higher Self is: all you want is just a tiny step away… just take the tiny step!

Spiritual Steps

Anyway, I went on my way to the store, about 30 mins on my bike, having the song in my head. “It’s just a shot away, it’s just a shot away…”

When I came there, the salesman in the store took about an hour to inform me about the choices I could make regarding microphones, stands, whether to directly record on my laptop or put an interface in between, and all those technical choices I had to make. And technical details are usually something I can’t handle, just not my thing.

Devine Timing makes all the difference.

I thanked him for the amount of time he had spent with me (an hour to help me make technical choices! wow!) and he said: I don’t know what is going on, usually it is more crowded, but for some reason it is quiet right now… that’s why I can spend so much time talking to you.

I knew what had happened: I had surrendered the timing to my Devine Self. I had waited for the nudge of my Higher Self, so my timing was perfect. Plus I now had all the info I needed to make the right choices regarding the equipment I needed. And I bought it.

On the way back to my house I saw a poster of some art exhibit with Rolling Stones art…(remember the song, it’s just a shot away?).

When I came home my son was listening to a random playlist on Spotify, the song that played when I entered my house was…. It’s just a shot away…!!!

As you can imagine… it gives me goosebumps even now writing about this. So much in tune with my Higher Self I was…

That is Devine Timing! That is giving up control and surrendering to my Higher Self.

The truth is… Everything is energy.

The Quantum Field, found and proven by science, is everywhere. It is the energy in the space between all atoms. It is between the atoms of trees, between the atoms of Earth itself, in your own body… everywhere! Everything is energy

In that subatomic space is the energy field Joe Dispenza refers to as the Quantum Field. This is the energy field where all possibilities exist… Think about that for at least a moment… an energy field where all possibilities exist…

Another word for the Quantum Field = God, or Source.

Trying to control the Quantum Field is like trying to control the ocean. Can’t do that!

An example to make the Quantum Field more practical and understandable:

My son Robin is a surfer. When I talk to him about surfing, he is talking about not being in control of the waves, because obviously you can’t be in control of that. He talks about moving with the waves. Using the power of the wave for his own movement. Moving with the waves, instead of trying to control them.

This to me is also a metaphor for how to look at the Quantum Field.

Go with the waves, don’t try to control them.

Factors of power in the attraction of your reality.

There are others factors that have energetic power in the manifestation of your reality. Like your soul, known as your Higher Self.Love from Spirit

Your soul has a plan, an intention to be here in this moment of the evolution of mankind. Your soul has an intention with you being born on this crossroads in time. Because that is where we are as a human collective, in a huge transformational period in our evolution.

The plan of your soul serves a purpose. It always has the purpose to remind you that you are a Devine Child of Source. Your soul always wants to lead you back home to Source. It wants to teach you to lift up fear (which has been designed to want to lift up). Your soul or Higher Self wants you to heal your karma (all the negative that has been stored in your subconscious) and to transform fear back into love.

Your soul has a plan to have you create Heaven on Earth!

If you don’t listen to your soul, negative stuff keeps coming back, in repeating patterns. Same faces, same places, different ball game? That’s what I’m talking about.

If you don’t listen to your soul and instead keep listening to your ego and try to control yourself, control others or control the things happening in your life, it can happen that unwanted manifestations become bigger. Until you listen.

Your subconscious has a lot of manifestational power.

This is most forgotten by people.

Even a lot of spiritual people or the ones studying Law of Attraction forget this: They see unwanted things happening in their life and then they judge themselves for not having sent out the positive energy with which they can attract a reality that is wanted.

But then judging yourself like that is bringing up negative emotions in and of itself of not being good enough. Which in turn will attract even more unwanted situations to your reality!

Then they try to control their thoughts even more… which is impossible! Because 90% of them is subconscious!

90% of your thinking is subconscious. 90% of your creation, or attraction power comes from the energy that your subconscious is sending out.

I have come to the conclusion that I am not in control, my ego is not in control, although it likes to think that it is…  😂

My soul is in control, together with my subconscious, also called my Inner Child. Better said: my life works best when I work together with my Higher Self and the Devine Child that lives in my heart. It works best when I surrender to my Devine Self…

It is just like with my dog: I can be a dictator to her, placing myself above her and in total control. In that case we will not have much fun together, it will not be Heaven on Earth to go on walks with her.

Or I can work together with her, placing myself besides her. Works way better!

Why is it good to give up control?

When you give up control you give the control to your Higher Self, your soul. Ask your soul to reveal to you the best steps to take. Ask your soul for instance to reveal to you the best job to do, in alignment with your soul’s purpose for this lifetime.Spiritual Path

Say: thank you soul, for guiding me, for helping me, for assisting me, for guiding me every step of the way, to find my way to all my desires.

Thing is, your soul or Higher Self, together with the Devine Child that lives in your heart, know all your desires. Plus they know, from where ever you stand right now, 20 or 30 or 40 paths to lead you to the manifestations of your desires.

Your Devine Self knows dozens of ways for you to manifest Heaven on Earth.

It has the overview, knows why you have chosen your family, knows what karma you came to heal or to transform, knows what you came here to do.

It is like the Devine part of you, your Higher Self together with the Devine Child, they are like a brilliant chess player. This chessplayer knows what happens 20 steps from now.

Your Devine Self knows what people are best to meet and talk to, to help you make steps towards your desires. It knows what ideas and solutions bring you closer to manifesting Heaven on Earth, manifesting happiness and bliss.

You are ‘in control’ of your desires…

So our little ego is thinking it is in control, while the real steering wheel of your manifestations lie with your Devine Self.

Thing is, you have chosen your own desires. Consciously or subconsciously. By stepping into contrast or unwanted situations, by having negative emotions or thoughts, our Devine Self receives that information and knows that it is the opposite that we want.

For instance: when you meet a person that is not respectful to you, and you feel the negative emotions of that, you automatically desire is the opposite: meeting people that respect and honor you.Emotional guidance

It is as simple as that. So you create your own personal desires, you are ‘in control’ of your desires, but your Devine Self is guiding you towards the manifestation of your desires.

And, you are not ‘in control’ of your desires in an ego way. Once a desire is born, you can not ‘unwant’ it. You can make it more specific (by stepping into more unwanted situations for example), so that your Devine Self gets more info on what it is your REALLY want.

Control is in contradiction with what you really want!

The basic question that is helpful to ask, is what do you want to feel? Because everything we want to create is because we think we will feel good when we’ve created it. Control is fear based, it feels at least a little anxious to have control based thoughts.

So when you keep thinking control based thoughts, the energy that you send out is a little anxious. And that is the energy that Law of Attraction is responding to, the energy with which you attract your reality…

Does the reality you want to create feel a little anxious at best? No… of course not!!!

Control and trust are opposites.

I assume (an easy assumption to make), that you want to create a reality in which you can relax, have fun, be creative and experience abundance, love and freedom. And the basic feeling that is needed in order to attract that reality is…. tada…. (drumroll please…) trust!

Because I do know people that have for instance created an abundance of money, but lack in trust. And that is a prison in itself I can tell you.

So you want trust to be a basic emotion you have.

The practice of letting go of control and surrendering to the plan of your Devine Self, will teach you this trust.

Don’t get frustrated if you find this hard to do, because we have been trained for many lives to think in terms of control.

When you go into this process, you will see it is a step by step process (as all processes are). And that you will grow this trust step by step, by showing your ego that it truly can trust the guidance of your Devine Self.

An example of letting go of control and how good that can work:

I was on a vacation with my ex, in Portugal. I was looking in the Lonely Planet book, to see what we could experience, but if I am totally honest, I was a little anxious that we would not have the wonderful vacation I desired if I did not control things.

At a certain moment, my ex was fed up with me trying to do all the things that were listed in the Lonely Planet book. We were driving and he threw away my lonely planet book through the open window….

So then we went by car and made our choices in a whole different way: whatever path or road looked good to us, we went into that path.

Trust intuition


We once did that and we found a beautiful waterfall. Nobody knew about it, maybe some locals, but nobody else, because it was not in the Lonely Planet book! So we could be there all alone, finding joy and togetherness just the two of us. One of the best experiences of that vacation!

Our Higher Selves knew that we craved some time alone in beautiful nature, so it led us there.

If you want to read more about how to let go of control and practice the Art of Spiritual Surrender…

Have you read The Celestine Prophecy? This is a book about a guy that is looking for wisdom in Peru and learns to follow his feelings and intuitive thoughts. They lead him to the wisdom he is searching for. He could not have found this wisdom with his controlling ego.

And that is actually a metaphor for life.

So, giving up control, which is fear based, means surrendering to the wisdom of your Devine Parts: your Higher Self and your Devine Child.

What will you gain when you give up control?

You will be surprised about how easy solutions come to you. It is like a surprise party of things falling into place in the most miraculous ways, in the most fun ways and with a perfection that is indescribable.

It feels like the whole universe is working together to help you to find easy and fun solution while all you do is feel good. It is literally like Heaven on Earth.

Will your life be bliss all the time when you give up control?

Well, not in my experience anyway. Reality is a path, on which I find places within me where love has been missing.Spiritual forgiveness Energy or beliefs that are asking for transformation into love and safety. Remember that fear wants to lift up?

When I find those I practice saying to myself: ah good, I have found another place within me that needs some loving. Instead of judging myself for doing something wrong.

And there are also parts of the path I walk that are overflowing with love. It can be that I feel satisfied, or inspired, or interested, or really in love with life.

The more I let go of control and the more I follow the calling of my soul, the more I heal my Inner Wounded Child, the more I find those sweet spots where things click into place with absolute perfection.

How to know whether you are in control mode or not?

The way you feel is the easiest way to distinguish if you are in control mode:

To me control feels and looks like:


  • my mind shifts from topic to topic
  • my mind keeps shifting from past to future and reversed
  • insecure and fear based thoughts go through my mind
  • my breath is shallow
  • I have almost no present moment awareness, being fully taken over by restless thoughts: what if… what if…. what if…. and in my mind I am trying to predict the outcomes of the different steps I can take.
  • my heart rate increases
  • it is hard to concentrate
  • I feel contracted

This is what I experience in surrender mode:

Spiritual joy

  • my mind is at ease, a thought here and there but not very active
  • I feel more than I think
  • I am aware of the present moment
  • I am aware of intuitive thoughts
  • I feel relaxed and secure
  • I feel trust
  • my breath is deep and relaxed
  • it is easy to concentrate on the present moment and on what I am doing in the moment
  • I feel expanded
  • I feel clarity
  • I am open receive thoughts from my Higher Self, Devine Inner Child and my team of guides, I hear or feel their guidance.


I hope I convinced you that letting go of control and practicing the Art of Surrender will open you up to bliss and happiness and to the manifestations that you so want with ease and joy.

Your Devine Self or soul is in control. Surrendering to that part of you, the part of you that knows what you really want and how to get there.

Your Devine Self has gathered information about your desires by the way you feel. When you have more and more manifestations coming from a place of trust, it is funny and so joyful to recognise that your Devine Self knows EXACTLY what you want and how you want it.

Life becomes much easier if you learn to trust your Devine Self. Just because then you don’t have to know a lot of things, you can leave them up to your Devine Self to figure out. Your Devine Self is the chess player that can think and see 20 moves ahead… you can’t! (I assume you are not a master in chess…😂)

Have fun with it, and if you have any questions, don’t hesitate to get in touch!

Leave a comment if you like. That is much appreciated!!! 🙏

About the author
I have discovered, through my own healing of trauma, that I have easy access to Spirit Guides, Ascended Masters and Angels. My sensitivity used to be a burden. Now it has become my biggest asset. I am quite direct and upfront and communicate the messages of your Guides. For they know you from the inside out and they know what needs to be healed in order for you to experience the joy of life.
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